When bacon makes you feel guilty

Its one of those mornings when I feel guilty of being an unprepared mother....so guilty, that I send an email to each child's teacher warning them of my mess ups and to please make sure their zippers are zipped, belts are buckled and if you don't mind, just run your fingers through their hair so that it looks a little brushed.  In my defense this is only the twentieth second morning since school started that it hasn't gone as planned.  I should be proud of myself!
  They have 50 minutes before they have to be out waiting for the bus....that's just ten minutes shy of an hour!  AND all they have to do is put food in their mouth and pick up the clothes in front of them and put them on their body...that's all!  They don't have to make their own lunches, or breakfast, and they don't even have to get their own clothes ready!  Its all prepared for them by their very loving mother.
  Jackson has taken on a whole new level of getting ready in the mornings!  Brandon junior is spending 45 minutes on the toilet in the mornings!  And I am just appalled by how this behavior can start so early in males!  In fact, I must be honest....I envy this behavior!  I wish that I could sit on the toilet with the door locked for just 5 minutes....5 MINUTES...that's it!  Another concept I do not understand about this behavior is the shedding of all the clothing!  I just can't imagine myself sitting on the commode naked, will all my clothes in a heap on the floor! Is that really necessary!
  The entire 45 minutes of this morning is spent with me going back and forth to the door yelling out a count down to how much longer he has to get dressed, and I really don't know why I choose to yell out, "10 minutes Jack....5 minutes! Jackson Mason do you realize you have two minutes to get dressed!" He has NO concept of time! He finally gets done and goes to the table to finish his bacon!  I yell, "you don't have time for bacon, go get dressed!"  I put his shirt and shorts on and I hand him the belt, I open the door and see the bus at the end of the street, heading our way!  "Hurry the bus is coming!"  I throw on his socks, (they are side ways) and slip on his shoes and grab his book sack. Avie is yelling from the bathroom that she has to tee tee!  Ahhhhhh!!!! She comes running out the door with her skirt unzipped and shoes in hand...it felt like the bus was waiting on us forever!  I finally get them both on and wave them off like it was just a typical morning.  Walking back to the door, I realize I am wearing pajama pants with kitty's on them and no bra! And....Oh look, I have another kid inside....he has been sitting in his own poop for 30 minutes!  I pick Cole up and on the floor see Jack's two pieces of bacon that he so badly wanted to eat and realize everything I forgot to do...zip Avie's pants, button that top button on her shirt, brush Jacks hair....and I feel like such a terrible mom!  He didn't even get to eat his bacon, and for some reason that made me feel the worse!
 

I'm going to finish drinking my coffee and look forward to a redo tomorrow.

Cole's Birth Story

Wow... Sometimes I look over at Cole and I am taken by surprise!  I should still be pregnant, but now I have a one month old, sleeping all warm and cozy in his cradle.   We had not anticipated to be having a baby 7 days before Christmas!  Everything was normal that weekend and I felt fine.  Brandon's work Christmas Party was that Saturday evening. The kids spent the night with my mom, and Brandon and I enjoyed sleeping late the next morning.  We picked up the kids Sunday afternoon and began our normal routine to prepare for a school week.  During the night, I remember dreaming that something was hurting a little more than usual but it wasn't enough to completely wake me.  Then at around 1:30 I felt a gush that woke me out of a dead sleep, and I thought my water had broke! I got up and went to the bathroom and found my pantie liner soaked with blood!  A rush of panic came over me and I called for Brandon. In a matter of minutes he had both kids loaded up and ready to go before I even got completely dressed. I climbed into the truck and remember thinking a million things on the 5 minute drive to Lane.  I was paranoid because I had not felt him move.  We checked into the hospital and ALL I wanted was to be hooked up to an ultrasound machine....I just wanted to know my baby was okay.  We were finally seen by a doctor after a million questions and he preformed an ultrasound. I remember feeling such a relief after just hearing his heartbeat.  He was okay!  I didn't even realize but I was having a few contractions, nothing major, and after he checked me, I was not dilated. Jack and Avie were still sitting in the truck waiting for Aunt Rhonda to pick them up, and I was so worried about them being left alone. I kept asking Brandon to check on them constantly!  I received a Brethine shot in my hip to stop contractions and they monitored me till morning.  By early morning my contractions were not stopping and the doctor decided to give me IV fluids for possible dehydration.  After 4 sticks and my vein blowing (whatever that means) from the nurse trying to start an IV, I felt a wave of heat over me and almost fainted. I asked her to stop, and that I needed a cool rag! She finally went and got another nurse, and she was able to start my IV.  Brandon went home to help Rhonda get the kids ready for school.  By 9:00 I was still having contractions and the doctor decided to give me a dose of magnesium sulfate, which makes you feel extremely HOT and weak.  I remember sweating a lot and the nurse went and got me a box fan! I was still not dilated and having a small amount of bleeding.  By noon, we are still waiting to see the doctor again and I can sense aggravation in Brandon.  I am still having contractions that are now causing me some pain and are about 5 minutes apart.  The doctor finally made it in, and wants me to continue to stay to be monitored,  but Brandon feels otherwise.  He decides that we are going to Womens!  I just wanted him to drive me there, but because I already had an IV, and for insurance purposes, I had to be transported by ambulance. Within the next hour, my contractions are becoming more painful and are coming every 3-5 minutes.  I am finally loaded up and have to ride by myself so Brandon can drive the truck just in case I am discharged to go home.  By now I'm in some serious pain, and I feel like a complete wimp because supposedly I am not dilated!  The poor old man riding in the back with me probably thought I was nuts!  My contractions were coming every 3 minutes, and every time I was grabbing onto the side of the bed, and I'm pretty sure my face looked like 50 shades of pain!  It was the worse ride ever!  Very bumpy!  We finally made it to Womans and as they are unloading me I feel a big contraction coming.  I yell to them "Stop!  Don't move!"  They actually listened and waited until the contraction passed.  Once I got into a room, things started to move pretty fast.  I was hooked up to all kinds of monitors and it was evident that I was having some pretty serious contractions!  She offered to give me some Stadol to help relieve the pain.  By this time I was squeezing Brandon's hand so hard I was hurting him! They went by Lanes medical records, which indicated that I was not dilated and decided to give me another dose of magnesium sulfate!  So again I am in extreme pain, sweating buckets, and my whole body feels like lead!  My doctor comes in to check me and I am        7 cm!  "What! But the doctor at Lane said I wasn't dilated!"  I yell.  "Well Honey, you having this baby today!" They rush in and start prepping me for delivery.  I receive all kinds of antibiotics and steroids to help the babies lungs.  I am dozing in and out from the medication and my contractions began to slow down.  After about two hours, I deliver Cole Frazier Mason in an operating room after two pushes, and my first vaginal delivery... I'm so glad I got to experience that. He was beautiful and perfect and had the sweetest faint cry when he came out.  I caressed his tiny hand and he was whisked to the NICU.  He weighed 3lbs  12oz. and 16 inches long.  He was a BIG boy for 9 weeks early!  After delivering the placenta, my doctor could see the dark spots caused by placental abruption, which causes premature labor.  His first photo was taken via Dr. Pernicero's cell phone, both of our phones were dead.

Despite everything that happened, we were so lucky that it turned out as good as it did.  God was amazing and had His hand on this family.  There are so many things that could have gone wrong that day, that did not. If you look up abrupted placenta or hear stories of other experiences its very scary, and some outcomes are losses.  I never once thought that he wasn't going to be okay.  The Holy Spirit was a big comforter that day and I am certain He was over Cole and I.  

Give Thanks....

November has been pretty eventful!   I am 29 weeks and moving slowwww!  My belly is protruding more and more everyday.  I now measure 41 inches around!  I miss being able to reach all the clothes out of the washing machine....I have to keep a yard stick handy, so I can reach those socks that straggle to the bottom.  I'm so glad its Winter, because shaving has come to a halt....poor Brandon!  I honestly don't do it, unless I have a doctors appt. and that's if and only I have to take off my pants! I cant even lean over the bathroom counter to pop a zit! I've thought about sitting on the counter, but then I wonder if I could get myself back down.  I even have to come up with a plan just to roll over in bed! I have been so thankful that I've been feeling good.  I only got sick once this month and it was because I decided it was a good idea to eat a slice of pizza....I was craving it! Not a good idea! I weigh as much now, as I did when I gave birth to Avie....well actually a few pounds more!  I'm not ready to disclose how much that is....but I have accepted it.  I am just waaaayyy bigger this time and there's nothing I can do about it!  I think I might try and get to the 160 mark, I may as well enjoy eating!  

Jack had snack duty this month and we made these cute little turkeys!  I had to listen to Brandon grip the whole time about why I had to put so much time into a snack, however he did help cut the Reese's  and I think that was only because he got to eat the other half! 

I also let Jack and Avie make their very own cake!  They are always asking to help out when I have a cake to make, and because I'm too paranoid that they are going to sneeze or drop something in it, I don't let them help, so I promised them they could make their own.

 Jackson discovered that making cakes is a little harder than it looks....after getting frustrated numerous times over his name not being straight, he ask me to do it!

 Avie on the other hand, did not want me touching hers, and her cake definitely shows just that!


I was able to go with Jackson's class on a field trip to a Corn Maze.  It was fun, but I regretted riding the bus!  Jacks favorite thing was riding this "cow", pulled by a tractor!

And this is him on the way back....sacked out!

 And for Thanksgiving we celebrated with lots of food and fun.  We went to Brandon's family for lunch and to my moms for dinner! I made green bean casserole, sweet potato casserole, a sweet potato pie and a pumpkin cheesecake with praline topping!

Thanksgiving at the Fraziers = lots of kids!

Dinner at my moms was yummy!  We had so much food!  The kids enjoyed running around playing and by the time we left the kids were exhausted!

Friday morning Brandon took Jackson on his first fishing trip to Leesville.  He had a great time playing with all the cousins and fishing!  However, he must have also caught a stomach bug!  By 6pm Sunday evening he was vomiting everything....and it continued until 8pm Monday night!  I think I washed 5 loads of blankets, sheets, and towels!  Then he started with fever all night and all day Tuesday.  Wednesday he was still weak and not himself.  Then Wednesday night Avie started with the vomiting and it continued until Thursday night.  Jackson stayed home again, because there was not way I was putting Avie in the car.  He went back to school Friday and Avie just had fever all day.  In the mean time, I am having a Garage Sale Saturday and trying to get everything together.  I'm worn out....and I know the kids are too!  We will all be glad when this week is over!

Its bad when your tongue is hanging out!

October Festivities

.....and October starts the busiest 3 months of the year.  I think we have something every weekend from now until 2013!  I am now 25 weeks, but look like I'm 35 weeks! I cant express how huge I feel!  I've also tacked on a few more stretch marks to go along with the others.  The kids argue over who gave me what marks.....and I tell them that this baby has beat them both!  I've been feeling really good and I think the weather is to blame.  I started off October by making a baby shower cake for a friend of mine's sister.  I've been telling people no for the past 4 months on cake orders and now that I am feeling better the cake making is starting to pick up.

The next weekend we went camping with our good friends at Chicot State Park.  The weather was awesome. It was actually the first weekend we got a cool front in.  We enjoyed sitting by the fire and taking "short" walks!  We carved pumpkins, and the kids even got to go trick or treating one night.  They  had a blast.  We also had a visit from a raccoon that got into Brandon's truck from a window that Jack left down!  It got into our McDonald scraps and my purse!  I had a whole bag of cough drops and it unwrapped and ate each one.....talk about a serious cough! I was just glad my bank card and license was still there. On the way home we found cute little paw prints in bar b que sauce all over Brandon's truck!

This is what kids do when you try to take a group picture!

The lake was beautiful!

Avie is going to be an awesome mom  big sister....she made sure
Kellan stayed out of trouble! 

Jack dressed up as "Punchinello" for book character day.  He's a character from one of our favorite books, You Are Special, By Max Lucado.  He said everyone thought he was Peter Pan!

Avie had a Halloween Party at her school and the parents were invited to come.  They sang Halloween songs, played games, and had lunch.  It was fun to meet all her little friends that she talks about playing with.  They sang about 15 Halloween songs (didn't even know there could be that many songs about Halloween) and shes been singing them everyday/all day for the past month, so I couldn't wait to video tape her singing!  I pretty much wasted my video tape, because she might have mouthed two words during the 15 minutes she was up there! 

This is her "Taylor" look!

 Video

For Halloween we dressed up as the Monsters Inc. crew.  Jackson was Sully, Avie was Boo, and I was Mike, the eyeball.  We had so much fun!  I just wonder if all the hours I spent making Boo's costume was worth the two hours she was in it!  Although.... she was the cutest Boo I've ever seen and Jackson was a pretty cute Sully!

That concludes the festivities for the month of October....stay tuned for November!

21 Weeks

Whewwww.....21 weeks today!  I'm half way there!  I even mopped the kitchen today for the first time in five months....I had to carry around a butter knife with me to scrap up all the gunk!  And I feel like I need a two hour nap.  I keep wondering when this second trimester burst of energy is going to kick in....I have big desires and plans to clean out and clean up, but my body doesn't have the same thoughts! I actually had to go buy all new bra's and underwear's the other day...I got tired of seeing my rear hanging out, and I'm a little embarrassed about the size I had to move up to....and it blows my mind that when I weighed at my last appointment I had only gained a pound in 4 weeks!  I must be doing some catching up this week!  Which by the the way, I have to say, I am feeling MUCH better!  I am eating more foods, although I am a little scared to venture out and try new things.  I have been craving McDonald's, Filet O'Fish sandwiches..... weird!  I cant tell you the last time I had a fish filet sandwich! I am also addicted to Edwards Pies...which could be a big problem!

And....the Ptyalism...excessive saliva has ceased!  Praise God!  I was beginning to think it would last the whole pregnancy! Avie made a comment the other day...."momma, you dont even thow up or spit anymore!"  She is just as excited as I am! I have only gotten sick a few times in the last 2 weeks!  I feel like a new pregnant person!  Avie and I have been enjoying going through all the baby clothes....especially hers.....we are cleaning out the attic!  

This past weekend, my best friend and I took a trip to New Orleans for the weekend.  I know, its kind of odd two pregnant women chose New Orleans for a relaxing weekend, but it was close and had a nice spa we wanted to try.  We basically ate the entire time!  Friday we went to a few shops and ate at a very nice restaurant called Mr. B's Bistro....it was soooooo good, and we found it by accident!

They are well known for their BBQ Shrimp...

I had bacon wrapped Shrimp & Grits....Yum!

We also had bread pudding for dessert, which was delish!  We were so stuffed that we had to roll ourselves back to the hotel. Saturday we walked through the River Walk and the French Market and of course we had to stop at the famous Cafe Du Monde!  

Then we had a massage, facial, and pedicure at Spa Atlantas.  It was awesome!  Then after our spa treatment we didn't want to move, but had reservations for a Jazz dinner cruise.  It was relaxing, although the weather wasn't so great, it rained most of the time.  And again we ate....dinner was a buffet of Louisiana cuisine....gumbo, red beans and rice, etc...

Overall we had a great time....just long enough to miss the kids and gain about 5 pounds!

Gender Revealed....

I had my first ultrasound yesterday and Avie and I got to see the duckling.....and find out if its a bebe boy or girl.  I surprised the boys with gender reveal cake!

            Don't make fun of  my cake....I iced and decorated it in 10 minutes.... that's a record

 Before the BIG reveal...the look on Jacks face is priceless!

 AND.......

 Drumroll......Love jacks hands....Avie is not too thrilled.

 It's A......

 BOY!!!!!!

And I am completely shocked, because I could have sworn it was a girl!

 Jack saying....."A Boy"!

And daddy with the biggest grin.....I wonder if he would have been this excited if it was a girl.....

I have to admit that I was totally taken by surprise....but there is no denying that he's all BOY!  Oh Joy!  I asked Avie as we were walking to the car....."What in the world are we going to do with another Boy!" Her response....."put him in the dishwasher!"  I hope she has changed her mind by the time he gets here.

And now for the proof!

For some reason it makes everything better when you can actually see the life growing inside you...

Cons of Pregnancy

Alright....Lets talk about this pregnancy a bit.  I've been avoiding it...not because I'm not excited, but because I just don't have anything good to say about it.  I'm not one of those "glowing" pregnant women...more like a "glowing green" pregnant woman, that always looks like shes about to vomit!
     The first 3 months were the worst.  I did not leave the house for about 6 weeks, and it wasn't because I didn't want to go anywhere, I just wasn't capable of going anywhere!  I was put on Zofran (a miracle drug) to help me keep something down.  I was vomiting all day, with extreme nausea all day! I was told I have hyperemesis gravidarum, a severe form of morning sickness, but now that Zofran is available, it is helping to keep food/fluid down.   However there are some side effects of the drug.....and because it stops up one end, it also stops up the other end!  Because I was also on Zofran with Avie, I knew of the effects and was prepared, or at least I thought.  I would take a Colace with every meal, a dose of Miralax, and alternate between Dulcolax and Senekot at night, and sometimes I still couldn't go!  I wont go into details on that, but it was miserable....so bad that I would give up the Zofran for every other day!  I was depressed and so tired of being sick, all I did was lay down and get up to vomit. I did not cook or clean for 3 months and Brandon had to give up a few vacation days to stay home, because I was not capable of taking care of the kids.  I remember feeling so bad for them, and so guilty.  I found Jack making his own sandwich for lunch one day, and boy did they watch a lot of movies and TV!   The nausea and constant vomiting started to get better around week 15.  I would get sick in the mornings and have somewhat of a normal day and by 4:00 I was sick again.  My food intake was limited to.....toast, mashed potato's, sandwiches, crackers, baked potatoes  toast, mashed potatoes... Gatorade, oh and I forgot to mention that I could not drink water for several weeks....it made me gag, then of course vomit. By now I am very educated on what the best and worst things are to have expelled out of your stomach! I have vomited so hard that I have busted blood vessels in my eyes and throat and have had to ice down my swollen face.....and I almost always pee while I'm vomiting...Jack and Avie have even offered me a pull-up!
      Today I am exactly 18 weeks....I can drink water, but cannot stand Gatorade! I can actually get up in the mornings without vomiting, if I go straight to the kitchen and make an egg sandwich...yes I know, my cholesterol will probably be through the roof!  I eat a sandwich almost everyday for lunch, and dinner is slim pickins.  I have learned not to "go off" of my cravings because they WILL make me sick.  For example....I was craving nachos the other day....just plain meat and cheese nachos, nothing else....I ate a total of 5 nachos.  Later that night, I got to know those nachos pretty well!  I cannot eat any raw or cooked vegetables, salad, or fruits with skin, like peaches and grapes, etc...I have tried and vomited everytime! So...I just stick with what works....baked potatoes!  Its a good thing for Flintstone vitamins, because that's the only form of  nutrition this baby is getting right now....yep, I cant even get down a prenatal vitamin! My days are pretty good, just always tired and cannot stand the heat!  My evening are getting better,  I have actually started cooking dinner, although I may not eat the dinner, I do cook it.  I get terrible heartburn over the slightest foods, and I am convinced that I even get heartburn from water!  I never had heartburn while pregnant with Jack or Avie, so this is new to me. I am at the top of Avie and Jacks prayer list... every night they pray for mamma to feel better, and their prayers continue to be answered, because I am much better than I was!
I guess I will go ahead and mention the famous "spit cup"....I know this is so disgusting and gross, but its nothing much I can do about it. As a result of the nausea and HG around week 14 I developed Ptyalism, which is an excess production of  saliva. You may ask....Why don't you just swallow the excess saliva....well because it makes me vomit. So I now have the luxury of carrying around a "spit cup"!  GROSS...I know...my husband has now resorted to kissing me on the check, because he's grossed out by it!  The only complication it causes is dehydration because it can cause a loss of one to two liters of saliva a day! So I do have to be careful and make sure I am drinking plenty of water.


And finally for those of you reading this that have probably asked....Why in the world did you get pregnant again!?  To answer your question.....I really don't know....all I can do is blame it on Brandon, and make him an appointment to see a Urologist soon........
Now that the hard part is over, I have been enjoying feeling the little kicks in my belly, its nice to know he/she will be worth it!

Alright....I think that sums it up....for now, and you are probably tired of hearing about vomit!

18 weeks